Ok, there was still some time for my baby to flip. I read after week 36 it would be very difficult for the baby to turn as there's very little space. I spent all day reading and worrying. I was going to spend the next weeks worrying about the position of my baby. I was imagining my baby will still be in breech position shortly before birth. That would shatter all my dreams of a natural birth at home and I will face one of my biggest fears - giving birth in the hospital and maybe a c-section. I remember how tense I was those days. How the worries took over all my moods and made me a nervous reck. I didn't want to let go of my dream of a natural birth at home. Something was to be done to help this baby turn.
I decided to try everything possible to help my baby turn:
- I spoke with my baby.
- I did mediation imagining my baby would flip.
- I walked on all fours around the house (very funny and uncomfortable).
- I held a torch and music in the direction where my baby should move his head.
- I did a breech tilt regularly.
- I went to a chiropractor for a webster treatment. The Webster technique is a specific chiropractic adjustment used to facilitate balance and improved function in the mother's pelvis.
- I went to accupuctnture (only once though as I didn't really believe in it).
- I did moxibustion (putting a very smelly burning stick close to a point in my foot that should encourage the baby to turn)
and finally I did an external cephalic version. It's a technique where a midwife tries to turn the baby from the outside by touching it through your belly. I had my doubts about doing this as I didn't believe in forcing my baby to turn. I also didn't have much trust in my midwife and even considered changing to one that was known to do this more gentle and with higher success rates.
It was one of the worst experiences in my life.
At no time my baby was at risk but I felt this was such an invasion on our pregnancy. It hurt terribly. Even for three days after I had bruises and pain every time I was moving. It hurt me and the baby mentally as well. The thing was my baby didn't want to turn. He was protesting. In the end even two midwifes were trying to push my baby from the outside around in my belly. It felt so wrong. My baby turned inwards so that they can't grab him anymore. Knowing his character now I have to smile at this, as he has such a strong character and hates any unwanted interference with his ways. At the time though it felt like I was treating him terribly. After the event, he went on hiding in my belly and didn't move for a couple of days. I was licking my external and internal wounds. Apart from the fact that this was not successful it left me feeling terribly. I believe this technique is not dangerous and can help many other women but for us it didn't work.
So now that my baby was still in breech at week 36 a birth at home with a midwife seemed impossible. As a consequence we had to leave our midwife practice and continue with the doctors at the hospital. Breech births are only done in hospitals. I felt horrible with that change. I loved the fact that throughout the whole pregnancy I had a midwife that would also be there at birth and now I was seeing different doctors every week, not knowing who would be at my birth and the worst I had to give birth in the hospital.
Those last 4 weeks were mentally very difficult for me. I was still hoping my baby would turn but every doctor appointment at the hospital left me frustrated. I saw a different doctor every time. I had to do ultrasounds every time. I had tried to avoid those during my pregnancy as I believe they are disturbing the baby and now I didn't even had a choice and had to do them. I even needed to do a doppler as the doctors thought my baby was too small and wanted to check if it got enough nutrition.
As I was so unhappy with the location of my birth and the fact that I would't have a midwife there that I know and trust I decided I needed more support. I hired a doula. I wrote about this before. Best decision ever.
I also read a lot about giving birth to a breech baby. I prepared myself mentally that this might be the case. I wanted to try for a natural breech birth and avoid a cesarian at all costs. I looked at videos of natural breech births. It seemed possible.
I got familiar with the hospital procedure for a natural breech birth. I was so lucky to be in the Netherlands where natural breech births are still possible. I was with a hospital that had an expert team in natural breech births and they gave me the choice to try for that given that my baby was healthy. After all I had the chance for a natural birth.
Nonetheless I hoped until the last moment that my baby would flip.
He didn't. But in the end I managed, I had a vaginal breech birth. My baby came out butt first. I am so proud of us.
More about this in a separate post.
After going through this journey I believe there's a reason for a baby to lay breech and that we should trust them to turn if it's possible or to stay in their position if they wish.
Useful sources on breech positions and breech birth:
http://spinningbabies.com
http://www.mybreechbaby.org
http://birthwithoutfearblog.com/2010/10/29/breech-babies-is-another-variation-of-normal/
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